It so closely resembles the emotional and physical survival skill we call intuition. I know it’s human nature to make some assumptions. If you feel like you've gotten complacent, make more of an effort to be physical with your partner. If your partner is behaving or speaking in a way that bothers or confuses you, do not leap to a conclusion about what their actions mean. Question the assumption. And a dangerous one. It means using them to make sure the other person can understand where you’re coming from (“I’m concerned that you might not have known about my view of X”). Even when you didn’t intend to cause any harm, it’s important to acknowledge that he or she may have been affected by … Deal with the struggle if the assumption was right. In making your point during an argument, you may inadvertently say something that hurts or otherwise invalidates your partner’s feelings. Are there any other reasons why Amy might be acting this way? Ask your partner questions, rather than making assumptions. Making assumptions is a bad habit. 2. Do not make assumptions. When Your Partner Hurts You, You End Up Apologizing Repeatedly gaslighted into believing my feelings were wrong, I grew remorseful for feeling them. Ask questions instead. By Cedric Benson. Sometimes the assumptions are right. People also make assumptions about their spouse’s feelings. Your rating: None. Instead, ask them—directly but politely—about whatever is concerning you. People defend their own culture because it’s a part of themselves. Avoid Making These Relationship Assumptions About Your Partner. Assumptions such as Alison’s take place all the time. Making assumptions explicit doesn’t mean using them as weapons (“I assume you never cared about X”). 3. Show Your Cards. In a healthy relationship, your partner hears you out if you’re upset, and their goal is to avoid upsetting you in the future, not to debate whether you should have been upset in the first place. The problem with making these types of assumptions, and we all do it, myself included, is that more often than not, we’re wrong. Making False Assumptions about Your Partner’s Intentions. Catch yourself making assumptions in the moment instead of too late. People tend to assume they know what the underlying meaning of someone else’s behaviors are. Then, if their partner doesn’t meet those needs, they assume their spouse doesn’t care. Average: 0. People often think their partner should just know what they mean and should understand their needs. In cross cultural relationships it’s common to defend your own culture and to make assumptions about your partner’s culture. Then we start to see these incorrect assumptions as the truth. For your health and well-being, and that of those around you. When You Make Assumptions In Relationships, You Miss Out On Getting Your Needs Met By Your Partner Posted on January 14, 2020 - By MadameNoire MadameNoire Featured Video Try thinking about the assumptions that were made. We assume that a person has a specific motivation for their actions or that an event took place for a specific reason. Your partner’s culture is different from yours and that can be scary. It would be unfair to say all assumptions are wrong, because we know from experience that’s just not the case. You need to be 100% sure the assumption you came up with has to be true. Tweet. Assume nothing. See all Articles by Chris Hartwell Get Updates on Marriage Coaching Get Updates on Chris Hartwell.
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